that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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