it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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