Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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