come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
