I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
