Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
