her vagina looked like bernie madoff
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
