do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize