There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
