You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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