Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
