We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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