WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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