Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize