i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Randomize
