I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
