I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Randomize
