everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
What drink are we having for lunch?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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