Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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