I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
