The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You're a waste of cheezeits
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
