You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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