I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I think a kid would responsible me up
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
