elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Randomize
