So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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