): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize