it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
