S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
