he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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