dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
where am i from again
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
So. Much. Porn.
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