I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
