I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
