M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize