thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
