Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize