Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
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