I don't remember. Are we still dating?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Vodka?
Forever.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize