Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
