how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
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