went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
