I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Randomize
