Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
