Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
