Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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