Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
