How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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