i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
