Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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