Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
