At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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